November 06, 2006

Some S***


Found some crap in my notes folder. Here's one. All I remember is that I wrote it in a single stretch. It's part fact, part fiction. Don't really know the why or what of this crap. Doesn't make no sense to me. If you find any sense in it talk to me.


Most nights I lay awake pretending to sleep. Playing pretend can be a really engaging activity. Playing pretend has got to work. No matter what you pretend, it’s got to work. I mean, what’s the whole idea of pretending when it’s not logical.

With the click comes darkness. The sub-conscious projector starts rolling the nightmare film. The film is perfect but the soundtrack always comes with an auditorium-echo. It’s like the sub-conscious is trying to up the spook factor with the echo. Most of the times, I am viewing the nightmare in sweeping wide angle shots. I rarely get close-ups, so I can’t figure who’s who.

I lay awake pretending to sleep. In my sleep, I am dreaming. I am dreaming that I am sleeping. I love making those dreams surreal. And what’s more surreal than sleeping in your dreams that you see while pretending to sleep.

Most nights I lay awake pretending to sleep. I don’t sleep because of the nightmares. Those dreadful nightmares. They come right when the sub-conscious starts playing the dreams. In my dreams I am always sleeping. Maybe my dreams are trying to fulfill things I can’t make happen.

The nightmares always begin when someone switches off the lights in my dream where I am asleep. I want to know who puts them off. I want to know if it is deliberate. I fall asleep, in the dream, and there’s this sound, the click of the light switch. Oh, I hear it every time. You know, like you hear sounds yet you know that you’re asleep. These things happen to me, I don’t know if this is an isolated incident.

Click. The light goes off. The nightmare switches on.

3 comments:

sunfever said...

You are pushing to enter into a state of awareness. This though is not it.

This is pretentious but not insincere. Saves it from being really crap. :-)

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